Menopause!

Wow! Did anyone tell anyone what a fun ride this is supposed to be?! I’ve heard enough from friends and family and the surprise element that comes with it to kind of get an idea about it and I thought it’s a good topic to bring to the forefront. We need to talk!

Whenever we were told that someone is going through the “change”, it was a scary, not to be spoken of event. Everything was hush-hush as most of these things are, which made them even more mysterious and scary. No explanation or advice was ever given to the next generation of women, everyone figure it out on your own! And the age, well there is wide range of years that it can start in. So again, lucky you, you’re on your own. So every generation of women is left wondering what the hell is happening to me? Why is my body becoming my own worst enemy?

But when you peel away the mystery it’s a simple physiological phenomenon that only we women are lucky to go through! The effects it’ll have on your heart and bones and overall health is just a bonus! You are also blessed with the inexplicable rage, sleepless nights, hot flashes, emotional roller coaster and the best part, zero energy. It’s like a truck hit you and left you on the road to crawl! It takes time for you to put two and two together to realize that maybe it’s menopause! And you still have to show up for work and deal with all the stuff that just needs attention all the time. And do it all with a smile that’s always expected of you regardless of how you’re feeling within. 

I wish more women would talk and share their experiences so we have a better idea on how to deal with it. Most doctors are also not forthcoming with what to expect and how to manage it, because it really is something that we have to learn to manage. For all the progress medical science has made, women’s health is never a priority. And lucky for us, it’s not just a physical issue, menopause messes beautifully with your brain. One day you’re depressed, other day you’re angry and the next you’re anxious and the brain fog that just takes over is just something else! But the worst part is you don’t know which day is it going to be! So lucky you, it’s a surprise every day! 

Society does not like to talk about these things so most men also don’t know how to deal with the women who are going through this. Either they’ll make fun of it or just leave the women on their own or maybe move us in a cave until we were over it!! We need a support system around us and if all our moms and mother in laws took the responsibility of teaching their sons to just be supportive and understanding of the women in their lives, this transition would be so much more easier. A cup of tea or a cup of coffee at the right time can do wonders for someone whose body is playing games with her:-) Or just staying quiet when she doesn’t want to talk is also a big help! I wish men could go through it for one day just to get some compassion for the women in their lives!

Is it the end of our productive lives? Hell no! Yes, we cannot have babies anymore but we can create so many more things that we didn’t have freedom for before. There is no clock ticking for us signaling that it’s all over for us. It’s what society wants us to believe. Look at Nancy Pelosi, Hillary Clinton, Shonda Rhimes, Diane von Furstenberg and the list goes on and on. All these women have shattered every ceiling that was put in place for women over 50 and they are not slowing down. 

Yes, it’s an end of a part of our life but a more vibrant and freeing part is about to begin. Freedom from mood swings and fatigue and cramps! It is finally a chance to speak your mind, to be taken seriously when you say something that can’t be blamed on PMS! So you get people’s attention much easier since now you’re wise just because of your age:-) All our lives we struggle to be taken seriously and boom, menopause will do it for you;-) Isn’t that something! 

It is a long and harrowing journey for sure and the reward may seem not worth it. Don’t be too hard on yourself and don’t try to nullify what you’re feeling. It is very real. We are all goddesses and stronger than any man or god! But we also need some caring and loving:-) Remember, you should be the most important person in your life, so take care of yourself:-) Just give yourself some time and love and some pampering and like so many tough times in life, this too shall pass:-)

So ladies who’ve gone through it and those who are on their way to this glorious chapter of their lives, raise a glass of wine, for only a woman can go through all this crap and still stay standing!