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Empty nesters

A little late but here it is. I wanted to feel the full effects of kids leaving home before writing it down:-) The ups and downs and the good and the bad and the ugly!  These are my thoughts and feelings about this process:-) It’s a misnomer to begin with. In the animal world the nest doesn’t stay empty very long. There are new chicks every year and the parents are busy with their babies again! Human nests, not so much. Once the chicks fly, they’re gone. They’ll never live in the nest again. From now on, they’ll visit and that’s the toughest part about all this. That reality is what’s the hardest to accept and sometimes it’s easier to not accept it. Whatever makes it easy.  How do we shove 17-18 year olds out to deal with whatever life has to throw at them? I think they need more time to mentally and emotionally develop before they are required to make serious decisions. One day they’re high school kids and next day they’re adults! They’re expected to act like they know everything and
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Menopause!

Wow! Did anyone tell anyone what a fun ride this is supposed to be?! I’ve heard enough from friends and family and the surprise element that comes with it to kind of get an idea about it and I thought it’s a good topic to bring to the forefront. We need to talk! Whenever we were told that someone is going through the “change”, it was a scary, not to be spoken of event. Everything was hush-hush as most of these things are, which made them even more mysterious and scary. No explanation or advice was ever given to the next generation of women, everyone figure it out on your own! And the age, well there is wide range of years that it can start in. So again, lucky you, you’re on your own. So every generation of women is left wondering what the hell is happening to me? Why is my body becoming my own worst enemy? But when you peel away the mystery it’s a simple physiological phenomenon that only we women are lucky to go through! The effects it’ll have on your heart and bones and overall healt
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Letting go

What a simple phrase this is. So many times I’ve heard this term and have always found it something that you’d tell others to do but can’t do it yourself! It’s never easy no matter what the logic.   Letting go of stuff, no problem. Letting go of ideas and thoughts, no worries. But letting go of your loved ones, nope! It’s heartbreaking no matter who it is. But especially gut wrenching if it’s your kids who are growing up faster than you want and are moving on with their life. Then letting go is the hardest thing you’ll ever do. Now that my firstborn is off to college, it seems like someone is pulling my heart out of my chest.  I never thought I’d be the cool mom who drops off her kids to college because it’s good for them and their future. No illusions there! I knew I’d be a wreck. I’ve been losing sleep for past three years so I’m a pro. So many things will be out of my hand and there’s nothing I can do about it. How can I make things comfortable and safe? What kind of food will she g
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Distance in a time of crisis

I’ve read “Distance makes hearts grow fonder”, but I think it also makes your heart grow fearful and weaker. For all of us who are making a life for ourselves and our kids in a different country or anywhere away from families, this last year was something no one was prepared for. Family is something that’s in the back of our minds pretty much all of the time. But with this pandemic I really realized how helpless we are when we are away from our loved ones. How little control we actually have in things that matter. The daily phone calls pleading our families to stay indoors and stay safe no matter what. Don’t meet anyone, don’t go anywhere, keep the mask on, hoping so badly that we could control the circumstances from so far away. Sending all the latest information and updates to keep them safe. The constant worry and panic with each passing day about things happening thousands of miles away? Or even things happening a few hundred miles away? It’s the idea of not being able to see our f
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Food!

Well you must be wondering where did this topic come from?! My motivation to learn and share the importance of what we put in our bodies started more than 20 years ago when my dad was first diagnosed with diabetes. That was the life changing moment for me when I realized how little we know and pay attention to this simple activity. Since then, learning and understanding how food and the types of foods     affects every single cell of our bodies has been a passion. So much to share, so little time:-) Much has changed since our grandmas and our moms made food. If they see the food most of us are surrounded with today, they’d faint! Why are we subjecting our bodies to stuff that our ancestors would have a hard time recognizing? Is it convenience or just ignorance? Or is it that eating healthy requires work and modern lifestyle leaves us all tired? Why our kids are eating snacks upon snacks when their energy output is so low? What were treats when we were growing up have now become a daily
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  Marriage This is a delicate topic but I’m putting down what I’ve observed in so many years of my life. What I think marriage should be and could be and what it definitely should not be. So read it with an open mind and a grain of salt:-)  They say marriages are made in heaven, but so are thunder and lightning! So if someone was dreaming of a smooth sail, it’s a harsh wake up call. Reality is almost always different than what we imagine it to be. It’s true for both parties, not just one.  Reading books and watching movies and listening to love songs, we all make an image of marriage in our heads. It’s true for both sexes. Girls are looking for a knight in shining armor and guys are looking for a princess they can save! So most marriages start with this kind of a premise and therein lies the trouble. The idea of marriage has been romanticized for way too long. We need to define marriage very differently than it has been defined for ages. Make it a real thing, not a romantic notion. Tel
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ABCD

We all know what that means! For those uninformed it means American born Confused Desis (Indians).   A phrase that apparently describes the first generation Indians born here in the US of A. But when you dive down deep, is it the kids who are confused or is it the parents? I believe it’s us, the parents, who are confused about if they are raising Indian or American kids. We are the ones who are pulling and pushing them in all directions. We have not given up on our Indian value system but we also want our kids to fit right in here in US. Therein lies the confusion. And are we willing to give up, no! Because our identity is tied with theirs so we hang on. We want kids that we can show off on both the continents! So they are some kind of a unicorn, right?! In some ways, I think our kids will be better adjusted to both worlds than we have ever been. I think they understand the nuances of both cultures and also know who and what they are. They have a strong sense of identity with America a
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